Supporting Self-Esteem in Tweens – Tips For Parents

If a child is to thrive in her lifetime, she must have a solid sense of her own self-worth. When a child believes that she is capable of facing life’s challenges and that her contributions are valued and significant, she can operate from a position of high self-esteem.

In years past, tweens, ages eight to twelve, were presumed to coast between the formative early years and the tumultuous teen years. But now young people, especially girls, are being confronted with mature concerns at an accelerated pace. Without the emotional maturity to process these issues, stress escalates and self-esteem suffers. Children with compromised self-esteem are more likely to engage in risky behaviors, have eating disorders, and suffer socially and emotionally.

Every child could enjoy the benefits of high self-esteem including resiliency, emotional well-being, a sense of personal success, and self-confidence. Yet the prevalence of low self-esteem in preadolescent and adolescent girls is concerning.

So what makes the difference in a child’s life? How does one child achieve empowerment and another suffer from the stress of life? In exploring the answers to these questions, we need to realize that self-esteem is not a gift that can be given to children. And once acquired, it can never be taken away. Rather, it is the gradual, reinforced adoption of positive beliefs about one’s own capabilities and value. This empowered self-perception can vacillate in strength and vary from one situation to the next. In other words, a child who has an apparently low self-esteem in school and other peer situations can demonstrate high self-esteem while engaging in horseback riding.

Every moment of a child’s life provides an opportunity to enhance or detract from her self-esteem. The way a child is treated by the people who are important to her can raise or lower the child’s self-esteem. The bottom line