Conscious Living: The Key to Positive and Lasting Change

Conscious: aware of one’s own existence, sensations, thoughts and surroundings; aware of what one is doing.

Unconscious: without
awareness or cognition; occurring below the level of conscious thought;
not consciously planned, realized or done; the unconscious: the part of
the mind containing psychic material that is only rarely accessible
awareness but has a pronounced effect upon behavior.

Our Unconscious Mind Impacts our Behavior
When we are living our lives in a state of true awareness wherein we
are truly conscious of our actions, we can free ourselves from
reactive, self defeating behavior and realize our personal best.
Unfortunately, although we may think that we make conscious decisions,
in reality our unconscious mind impacts our behavior. Our actions are
therefore not truly under our control. We can learn to recognize the
unconscious, that part of our mind that has great power over much of
our actions without us even being aware of its existence. In doing so,
we can diminish its power over us.

The Voice is out to Sabotage Us
As an example, try simply noticing that voice inside your head that
gets very chatty whenever you are about to make a decision, especially
an important one that could result in change. Is it telling you that
you’re nuts to consider what you are thinking of doing? Does it say
that you failed once before and will probably do so again? This chatter
is easy to recognize because that voice, or chorus of voices, is
activated all day long. Just walking into a room of strangers gets it
going! They don’t like me, I don’t belong here, ya-da, ya-da. We
fail to understand that the voice is out to sabotage us.

Empower Yourself to Make Truly Conscious Decisions
The voice is not you. It is a manifestation of your subconscious
fears. Just by noticing it you will realize that this inner saboteur is
at work. In the act of noticing you begin to empower yourself to make
truly conscious decisions that will result in positive and lasting
changes in your life.

Our Unconscious Colors our Reaction
The voice is the mind chatter that we can recognize. What about all
the subconscious stuff that is also at work but much harder to
identify? Quite often, we find ourselves quickly reacting to life’s
circumstances instead of taking time to stop, listen and think things
through. For instance, your friend may ask you if you aren’t feeling
well because you don’t look so hot. You might immediately react by
snapping back, “What do you mean I don’t look good?”  Your
feelings got hurt because you are extremely sensitive to any sort of
criticism. Those feelings of low self-esteem may stem from a parent who
was always extremely critical: the why does not matter. The bottom-line
is your friend meant exactly what they said: are you okay? Nothing
more. You added the rest. You were unconscious in your reaction. You
allowed your past to repeat itself.

Choose to Look through Crystal Clear Lenses that do not Distort Reality
When we live on a conscious level, we are as alert to what is
happening as a deer in the woods who hears something unknown. We insure
that our actions, our decisions, our communications are not influenced
by the myriad filters we apply to life. We don’t look through rose
colored or black glasses; we choose to look through crystal clear ones
that do not distort reality.

Thank the Voice in Your Head for Sharing and Move On
We recognize that the voice in our head is inauthentic and we
proceed without its input. Thank it for sharing and move on. We start
to see that reacting to life to very different from acting from a place
of awareness and consciousness. We learn to recognize reality for what
it is and not for what we think it should be. We choose to make
conscious decisions versus unconscious ones.

Free Yourself from Doing the Same Things Over and Over Again
Life Coaching has a very strong emphasis on the act of conscious
living. We learn how to recognize when we slip into unconsciousness,
thereby training ourselves to be more and more conscious of what is
really happening. We free ourselves from, doing the same things over
and over again. We learn from our heightened sense of awareness. We
begin to see things differently, in a much more objective and clear way.

Notice Your Mind Chatter and Stop Reactive Behavior
There are myriad ways that one can begin to practice conscious
living. First and foremost is to notice your mind chatter. Just notice
it. Secondly, to stop reactive behavior, walk away when you sense that
you are not in control. Recognize your danger zone. When you feel the
rush of emotion starting, step back and count to twenty. Don’t give
in to the rush. Cool off. Take a brisk walk. Look into those activities
that clear your mind and create calm. Some people meditate, some do
yoga or chant. Others find that 18 holes on a golf course is a
spiritual experience. Whatever works for you.

Be Alert, Focused, Present and Totally Aware
Always examine your actions and decisions to ensure that they are
made without self-defeating habits. Are you seeing reality as it exists
or through some sort of filter? Drop egocentric behavior that clouds
the issue and only serves to reinforce bad behavior and poor
decision-making. Be like the deer in the woods: alert, focused, present
and totally aware.

Learn more about Shelley at: lifeafteryourdivorce.com