Collaborative Law: The Cooler Contemporary Uncoupling

Indeed there you, the luminous, love-tossed twain were, equally en-jean-ed and idling arm-in-sliding-arm down midsummer pavements–littered and clean-leaning alikebreathing as unison deeply in that succulent, ne’er-ending sweet flesh of your created, living, love…’twas so dearly Sunday-morning-paper-coffee-bed once the soul-stirring dream-sequence of every diamond engagement ring commercial–carelessly condensed into one couplehood.Now, You-Are-Here on the Heartbreak Hotel nMall map, uttering uglies like my lawyer’, your lawyer’, and d-i-v-o-r-c-e(the latter in the presence of your progeny and pets), and wondering in your yawning yoga moments how, at the very least, your stained relationship can be legally rent without a War-of-the-Roses-style staircase scenario. Kumbaya!Here is one type of egalitarian, ADR Ex-Making that could leave you blissfully‘ unhitched and (in peace, at least) still believing: Collaborative Law.

Most unspouses-to-be are unfortunately unaware of this contemporary tool for severing unsavoury marital unions, as indeed it is a relatively recent option. The true art of this ADR technique is actually at its blueprintone participation agreement filed with the jurisdictional court, two parties, two collaborative lawyers, and a small parade of neutral experts designed to eagerly educate the parties as regards the individual elements of their dissolution.

Collaborative lawyers, unlike divorce litigators, are required to be specially trained in conflict resolution techniques, and when specifically retained as such, therefore possess a dual duty of both effective representation of their client, and active, interest-based negotiated settlement.Essentially, collaborative lawyers, when all are, e.g., in a negotiation conference together, act as a neutral divorce mediator wouldk-o-ing any combativeness of the couple, and attempting to obtain an agreement between the parties–whilst still maintaining that non-neutral, coach-in-your-corner facet that is the calling card of divorce litigators.

Additionally, a pivotal aspect of the collaborative law process is that neutral experts–such as mental health professionals, accountants, and/or financial analysts, etc.–are trotted out before, and/or during, the settlement negotiation process, to assess the couplehood’s specific situation, and provide reliable industry punditry that assists said parties with realizing and weighing their options as regards, e.g., their kids, pets, and assets. Communication experts are also oft retained, to help parties that are hung up on linguistic points to push well past them.

If a settlement is reached at the conclusion of the collaborative law process, the supervising jurisdictional court is again notified, and voila-kumbaya–both of you are now peaceably proud participants in the exesclub (if not, the collaborative lawyers must unlink from the parties, releasing them to the divorce litigators of, seemingly, their darkest dreams). Plus, substantially less paper is required to be produced throughout its peacemaking processunlike, e.g., during the traditional litigation trip. Tis simply a neat, nice, nouveau way to untie the proverbial knot.

Many divorce litigators have now undergone collaborative law certification, and have thereby added the discipline to their practice points, so whilst the widespread reality of it is yet young, locating a collaborative lawyer in most jurisdictions is usually as easy as conducting an online- or snail- telephone book search.Additionally, some collaborative lawyers opt to list themselves with similarly-named professional associations, institutes, and/or academies, which typically provide additional resources concerning the process to the searching public.

So, if tis truly your time to unclasp clappers and wonder aloud what you were thinking when you chose so-and-so to share your sidewalk, at the very least carefully consider Collaborative Law as one of your delightful, sturm und drang-delivering divorce litigation alternatives.

Fey Ugokwe, J.D., is the Founder/Editor-in-Chief of ADRPAGES.COM
Article first written for, and published on, her conflict resolution e-zine ADRPAGES.COM which is a pioneering, free E-Zine that provides Alternative Dispute Resolution news/information to the public.