Is Self-publishing Right for Everyone?

Work Life Balance Myth or Reality?
Yes I have “done it all”. Two active sons, 32 year old marriage, two businesses and aging parents were the top priorities in my life. Now at 63 I look back and get tired just thinking about what I did day to day!

So now when women speak to me about “balance” I think they must be joking.

When my boys were growing up and my businesses were growing I just prayed that the school wouldn’t call, the boys wouldn’t need to go to the emergency room or my bank wouldn’t call in my business loan!

Balance was just getting through the day. I liken it to “juggling” not “balancing”.

When you think of it as juggling you give yourself the space to drop a ball and there is always one that drops!

Life is never balanced for women we can only hope to remember all that we have to do and to do it reasonably well. If I thought I also had to balance something I would have spent valuable time worrying about why I couldn’t get the kids, my husband, my businesses and me to balance. Kind of like the $9 I perpetually couldn’t balance in my check book!

So here are my suggestions to keep all the balls in the air;

1. Give up Perfection as a way of life!
Yes be strong and fling your perfect pictures of how you are supposed to be out the window. I promise you you will be a lot happier and that will make your kids happier.

Start small. I started with our master bathroom shower stall because no one but my husband and I saw it and we didn’t mind the stray science project growing in it.

2. Ask for Help

Yes if you ask for help you may get it and then you can juggle more balls. I like to say that your success at juggling depends on what your support system looks like.The bigger and stronger the support system the more balls you can keep in the air.

3. Expect to drop a ball, all the time
I suggest you accept life is not about keeping all the balls in the air but how quickly you can pick up the balls you dropped. So get good at apologizing. It’s actually freeing to say I dropped that ball and I’m sorry!

4. Look for short cuts
I never baked a cupcake or cookie for my sons’ schools. I didn’t have time. And for me the priority was being with the kids. But I did have a great system of bakeries and my own Tupperware so I would buy the baked goods and put it in my Tupperware and bring it to school. Only a few moms and teachers knew what I was doing. my secret was safe with them! When someone would ask me for the recipe I told them it was a secret!

5. Remember It Is Only Temporary

That became my mantra: It’s only temporary! Within a blink of the eye your kids grow up and leave and what ever issues you are dealing with now you won’t be dealing with later.

In other words enjoy it now cause tomorrow it changes!
Now visiting my grown sons and their girlfriends I think back to how much time I spent worrying for nothing! Minimize that now if you can!
and lastly

6. Have a Sense of Humor!
I can’t tell you how much that has gotten my husband, children and I through some pretty sketchy times. Laugh and keep on laughing and if you drop a ball laugh at yourself! Trust me it Helps.

Looking silly is part of juggling! So enjoy the freedom it gives you!

So I never found balance but I did get good at juggling and I had a lot of fun doing it!

Susan Van VleetPresidentSusan Van Vleet Consultants Inc www.womenmovingforward.com

Is Self-publishing Right for Everyone?20658Is Self-publishing Right for Everyone? When I wrote my first fiction novel I was adamant about getting it published immediately. I had heard there were months involved when sending your work to a large publishing house. It could also be rejected by several before it was ever published and that could involve years. I wasn’t willing to wait. I researched self-publishing companies and settled on one that was local. I had great results and the release time was perfect.

Being self-published means you either have to hire that publishing company to do your marketing at an unexpected high fee, hire an outside publicist, or do the marketing of you yourself. I chose to hire my own publicist and after 3 months I let him go. He did very little for a lot of $$. I then proceeded to do my own marketing by setting up book signings, personal talks, a video for my web site, and writing my own press releases. After all, I am a writer!Ipass out business cards wherever I go, even to the cashier at Wal Mart! I market my book with pens and temporary tattoos as handouts at book signings. That went well locally.

Nationally, I just wasn’ta big enough name to open any doors. Now I am spending several hours each day researching the internet for ways to market my book beyond the Indiana state line. The results I find are infinite. It is mind-boggling at how many venues there are to getting published and reviewed. I send emails, make phone calls, write letters, and send books off to foreign countries for reviews. My progress is slow but I am not discouraged. During all this, I am a teacher and I am writing book two of my trilogy. I manage to fit life in on the side! I do all this in hopes ofretirement with days filled with writing and reading.

I am now looking into hiring a Public Relations person to do the leg work so I can concentrate on writing. Ifeel very positive about this one! I realize there are still many things I will need to do on my own to take my books to the level I am seeking. I am more than willing to do this.

One of my main goals is not to pad my pockets, but rather to use my good fortune to share with those less fortunate than myself. I have family and friends who are struggling in this economy. We rescued a little Yorkie from a puppymill last year and I would love to be able to donate to shelters for animals. I feel drawn and blessed to be able to use my talents and abilities to entertain others throughbooks. Working towards this does not frighten me.I started my writing career later in life than most. Who would of though a 59 year old grandmother would be writing about vampires? Vampires are hot right now and mine are smokin’! I accomplish all this with clean language throughout my books so as to reach a wider audience.I have addedinteresting twists to thevampire world not done in any other series. I even use my deceased relatives as my characters. They can’t complain or criticize my work!

If you would like more information on Vampires from Indiana you can find it at www.asilentheart.com.
My motto: Do not take no for an answer and don’t give up!
Roberta Hoffer / author / Silentheart