Vacations Mean Wearing a Bathing Suit

It is that time of year when my female clients are getting bent out of shape because their spouse or boyfriend has booked them a sunny and warm vacation in the Caribbean. It is the last place they want to go they tell me because it means they have to be seen in their bathing suit, and they just aren’t slim enough to put one on. This is becoming an annual discussion I have with clients, because the thought of putting on a swim suit for most women who don’t see their bodies as perfect enough is more unpleasant than the prospect of having a romantic and much needed get away. I don’t know of any man that can relate to this, but I’m sure the majority of women can.

It is an awful feeling to be in public when you think you look positively ridiculous and disgusting squeezed into a piece of spandex. But you don’t have to look squeezed into a suit anymore than you have to feel disgusting or judged for who you are. There are three things you can do to feel differently so you want to jump up and down for joy that you are one of the lucky ones getting away for winter or spring break.

One of them isn’t to go on a quick diet ahead of time. That is the worst thing you can do, because you will set an unrealistic weight loss goal and feel miserable that you didn’t achieve it. You will also deprive yourself on the diet, which will lead to even greater overindulgence and feeling badly while on vacation.

Instead the first thing is to get a suit that fits you properly, which I understand can be challenging in itself. The idea of wearing a bathing suit on vacation is almost as unpleasant as shopping for one, but it is worth it. Not only that there are many companies that offer slimming bathing suits and you can try them by ordering on line. Here are a few sites to check out: cyberswim.com, onehanesplace.com (carries TrimShaper), itfigures.com, landsend.com, and aswechange.com. You may be surprised to find you look pretty darn good in a well designed suit.

Whether you do find a suit that you think is flattering or not, the second thing you can do is pretend you look fabulous anyway. When you feel good about yourself, you stand up taller and look more attractive. More importantly, when you feel more attractive you feel happier, stronger and more positive. I once worked with a client who was nearly 400 pounds, and she agreed to try thinking of herself as thin for a week. She was amazed how well it worked for her. She felt more confident, in control and good about herself, which motivated her to exercise, eat in a healthier way and take better care of her body. In contrast, when you feel ugly, fat and out of control, the tendency is to turn to food for comfort and numb out in front of the TV.

This leads to the third thing you can do, which is to stop caring what other people think. What matters is what you think and what you choose to believe. If someone is judging you and you don’t care, then does their judgment matter? Or turn it around. If you see someone you think is out of line, badly dressed, eating what you think they shouldn’t or too fat, but they don’t seem to care what you think, then where does that judgment go? If they don’t take it on, it doesn’t get to them. It stays with you. As the saying goes, when you have one finger pointing at someone, there are three fingers pointing back to you. When you judge others, you are actually focusing on the thing about you that deep down you don’t like about yourself or that you harshly judge yourself for. Or it can mean you are too hard on yourself in general, and sadly the more you judge yourself the more you will judge others.

Once you are armed with your new suit, new attitude and determination not to accept other people’s judgment of how you look, a trip to warmer climates can be relaxing and enjoyable. This week try thinking yourself thin and choosing not to take on anyone’s judgment of you. You may find you have more fun and judge others less in the process.

Alice Greene is president of Feel Your Personal Best, a healthy lifestyle coaching company located in Newburyport, MA. Contact her at agreene@feelyourpersonalbest.com or 978-465-3555×5.